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A decade ago, when Rabbi Deborah Wechsler first came to Chizuk Amuno Congregation for an informal interview for the associate rabbi position, she says she basically did it on a whim.
“I came in for a look-see,” she said. “The synagogue understood I was just coming to check it out. I’d never even been to Baltimore before.”
But Rabbi Wechsler, a native of New Rochelle, N.Y., who was ordained at the Jewish Theological Seminary, was impressed by what she found at the Stevenson congregation, and vice versa.
On May 30, the second day of the holiday of Shavuot, Chizuk Amuno will pay tribute to Rabbi Wechsler for her 10 years of service there. In her honor, congregants have raised $55,000 – including a $10,000 challenge grant from the Florence and Charles Hoffberger Foundation—for tuition assistance for all of the synagogue’s schools. (Chairs of the event are Mimi Blitzer and David Mallott, and Heller and Ari Zaiman.)
The BALTIMORE JEWISH TIMES recently spoke to Rabbi Wechsler, 39, about her tenure so far at the 1,500-member synagogue. The rabbi lives in Stevenson and has two children, Rena, 3½, and Rubin, 1½.
BALTIMORE JEWISH TIMES:What does this 10th anniversary mean to you?
Rabbi Wechsler: Nobody’s more surprised than me that I’ve been here for 10 years. [Chizuk Amuno Rabbi Emeritus Joel H.] Zaiman interviewed 18 people from my rabbinical school graduating class for the job, and I was not one of them. I wasn’t interested in going into the pulpit. He asked me why I wasn’t applying and I said, “I don’t like getting up on Saturday mornings.” [Laughs] I had no interest in being a pulpit rabbi. I expected to be a teacher.
But from the start, Joel and I hit it off, and he said, “Come on, send something in,” so I did and came down to check [Chizuk Amuno] out, and I was hooked from the beginning.
The congregation said, “You can do it all here – work with college kids, high school students, the community,” and they were right. It was a place that had, and has, high standards on education and quality. It had everything.
Also, I knew I could learn here. Joel taught me how to be a rabbi, and [Chizuk Amuno Senior] Rabbi [Ronald J.] Shulman has taught me how to be a better rabbi. He brings a whole new set of skills to the job.
Are you a bridge between the Zaiman and Shulman eras?
I think I’m a bridge between the years. I’ve been able to work well with both Rabbi Zaiman and Rabbi Shulman. They’re very different people with different focuses in their rabbinate, and I hope there’s a sense of continuity and history at the shul. At 10 years, I have some institutional history.
What was it like to be the first female rabbi in Chizuk Amuno’s 138-year history?
They were ready and looking forward to having a woman rabbi when I came. It was obviously a big deal for the synagogue. But I didn’t really encounter any problems or sexism.
There are a few funny stories—“What do we call you?” People were much quicker to call me Debbie when I first got here. A lot of people thought I was the rabbi’s secretary. I still get that occasionally. Also, I’ve occasionally had the family who said, “We don’t want her to officiate, our grandfather is Orthodox.”
It doesn’t really bother me anymore. But at the beginning, I wanted to be judged for my abilities and character, not my gender. I never used to give a feminist sermon or spoke personally, because people expected it of a woman rabbi. But I understand this was a big thing for a town that hadn’t had a woman rabbi hired at a major congregation in about 20 years.
Do you consider yourself a role model for young girls?
I like to think so. I never saw women at the pulpit as a kid. I didn’t have a role model like that. Young girls today see women at the pulpit. I hope it’s not a big thing for them, but that they see it as an option.
What are your primary responsibilities at Chizuk Amuno?
I was the teen rabbi when I first came here. I did USY [United Synagogue Youth], taught Netivon [the high school program].
Now, we don’t work so much with a sense of portfolio. Everyone does everything. Last year, I took over kashrut for the synagogue. We try to have rabbinic involvement at every level.
I’m more involved now in the preschool because I have kids in that demographic. I teach at Krieger Schechter [Day School] and at Rosenbloom [Religious School], and I teach adult education. I’m all over, and I do all of the rabbinic functions – a full-service rabbinate.
You carve out a niche for yourself, depending on the niche and you. You grow into a job, and you grow the job.
What kind of Jewish environment did you grow up in?
I came from a mixed background. From kindergarten through eighth grade, I went to a Solomon Schechter school. Then, I went to a modern Orthodox yeshiva high school, Ramaz, in Manhattan. And I grew up in a Conservative synagogue and an Orthodox one.
And then you worked at the famed 92nd Street Y in Manhattan for three years in the ‘90s?
Yes. It was a great time. I started going to shul at BJ [B’nai Jeshurun Synagogue] on Friday nights, and they wanted to start a morning minyan. So I did it because no one else could lead the service. Up to that point, I’d never really been involved in egalitarian Judaism. It was a good demonstration of if you want a good Jewish community, you have to create it.
I felt I had a responsibility. How can you Jewishly educate women equally and then not have them use it? I had a lot of trouble having the knowledge base and being asked to sit behind the mechitzah [separation between the genders] and not be counted.
What were your early years at Chizuk Amuno like?
When I first got here, people wanted to hug and kiss me in the receiving line. Because I’m a girl, they think you’re supposed to hug and kiss them. But I’m not that kind of person.
But the early years were great. I worked so hard. I did a lot of teaching – six or eight classes a week, and I learned so much on the job. I’d watch Rabbi Zaiman do funerals, and I learned a lot.
Do you enjoy being an associate rabbi?
[Beth El Congregation Rabbi Emeritus] Mark Loeb always says that being an associate rabbi is the best job in the world. If you do something great, you’re praised. And if something goes wrong, it’s blamed on the senior rabbi. [Laughs] The ultimate responsibility of the synagogue is with the senior rabbi. I have responsibility and input with my respective things, but ultimately the synagogue is in the hands of the lay leadership and congregation, and we’re engaged by the congregation.
So yes, it’s a good job. Being an associate rabbi is a cushy job.
Most associate rabbis only stay for a couple of years at their first pulpit. Why have you stayed for a decade and counting?
It’s a great job. I do something different every day. I can be with a family at a hospital one day, the next day in a classroom with teenagers—the full spectrum.
And I’m still learning here. There are still challenges. That’s what’s great about Ron [Shulman]. He always says, “What do you want to learn? What’s your next interest?”
It really feels like home, an extended family. My kids have literally hundreds of bubbies and grandpas here.
Would you like to be the senior rabbi of a synagogue someday?
People ask me that all the time, if I want my own congregation. Someday, sure. But I have the best of all worlds here. I can’t imagine a better situation.
What are the pitfalls of being a rabbi?
You’re always on display, even if you go out to eat or get your hair cut. You live in the public eye, which has its good and bad.
How has Chizuk Amuno changed since your arrival?
When I first came here, we were wearing black pulpit robes on the bimah Now, we don’t wear pulpit robes, except on yontif [holidays]. We used to have formal receiving lines after Shabbat.
Also, I think Rabbi Zaiman and Rabbi Shulman had and have different priorities. Rabbi Shulman is very focused on Saturday morning Shabbat worship. Rabbi Zaiman was committed to other things.
Institutionally, it’s the same. It still has a real commitment to education, and it’s multi-generational. We have people here whose families have belonged for four or five generations.
How can big congregations like Chizuk Amuno better serve young Jews and unmarried Jews?
A lot of people here have said to me, “You don’t do anything for singles.” They feel forgotten by the synagogues. It’s sad to hear. But I think a lot of people drop out of Jewish life until they need it because they have young families. We have to get a better sense of what they want – a Friday night experience? A nice Shabbat dinner?
One way is, I’m doing gemilut chesed [acts of kindness] as part of my portfolio. We’ve received an endowment for social action in the congregation, and that’s helped people access who never normally would have come to a synagogue. I think the social justice aspect is appealing to that age group.
What direction do you see Chizuk Amuno going in over the next 10 years?
I think we’ll continue to work on Shabbat services. Over the next 10 years, we’ll develop options for services to appeal to a broad constituency.
I think we’re looking to appeal to people where they are in their lives, and not just set a bar and say, “This is where you have to be.” We have to help people live full Jewish lives, and we’re creating an adult education program that will feel more integrated in the community. Also, in the next 10 years we’re going to focus on the teen community more.
And the congregation’s philosophy? Will that change?
Philosophically, we have to continue to make Jewish life relevant here.
What do you consider your greatest accomplishments over the past decade at Chizuk Amuno?
The relationships I’ve built. Creating relationships with families – that’s what a rabbinate is really about.
Where do you get ideas for sermon topics?
I keep a sermon file, a running file of articles or ideas or quotes. I generally don’t talk about politics in my sermons but the enduring Jewish stuff. I base my sermons on the text and try to use it as the lens that we see our lives through.
I love to preach and to craft a sermon. But I still get nauseous every time I do it. But I get over it.
Why do you get nervous?
If someone comes to shul one time a year, that’s a lot of responsibility. Sometimes I hit the mark, sometimes I don’t.
But it’s always gratifying when someone recalls something I said in a sermon. It’s great when you see you’ve moved someone.