Comment
February 15, 2008
RA Hypocrisy
Meredith Jacobs
Special to the Jewish Times
Justice Stephen Breyer and Democratic National Committee chair Howard Dean were not invited to speak at this week’s meeting of the Conservative movement’s Rabbinical Assembly.
With the presidential race running at a furious pace, wouldn’t these have been wonderful choices? Yes, but Mr. Breyer is married to a non-Jewish woman and Mr. Dean is the non-Jewish spouse of a nice, Jewish girl.
As RA Executive Vice President Rabbi Joel Meyers told the JTA Wire Service, “The policy is we will only invite speakers who are either single or, if they are married, are not intermarried.” Granted, most rabbis were not aware of this policy until called by JTA for comments.
I will state, for the record, that I believe in the wisdom of marrying within our faith. Marriage is challenging enough without adding the burden of trying to reconcile two different belief systems. I hope, actually I pray, that my children marry Jews. That said, I have a profound respect for non-Jews who are raising Jewish children. And I acknowledge that as a highly integrated people, the chances are very high of our children falling in love with a non-Jew.
But to discount a potential speaker over the choice of a spouse is wrong. I expected more from my rabbis. I understand that one may think that to invite, moreover, to pay a speaker who lives a lifestyle contrary to the fundamental laws of our movement is hypocritical. So I ask: Is there a policy against Christian speakers? Or homosexual speakers? How about speakers who shop on Shabbos? And what about the one who (gasp) eats the occasional cheeseburger?
If the topic of the speech was “Why marrying a Jew is the best idea in the world” then, yes, keep the ban. But if a speaker is invited because of expertise on Democratic candidates, what’s the issue?
Incoming RA President Rabbi Jeffrey Wohlberg said the policy will be revisited. The sooner the better.
The sad reality is that intermarriage is happening more and more and it’s also time the RA reverses its decision on interfaith marriage. If Conservative rabbis can now consecrate same-sex unions, they should be allowed to perform interfaith marriages.
Again, personally I support marrying within our faith and I believe that it is terrible that we have come to this, but the reality is that the Reform movement has grown largely because of its open-arms policy. The Conservative movement’s intolerant policies will ultimately do more harm than good.
I’ve heard the argument that intermarriage is doing what Hitler could not. This is a narrow and limited view. Simply because a child is of mixed heritage does not preclude the child from ultimately identifying as a Jew. However, for this to happen, we must maintain access to these children. If we continue to close the door, then we are responsible for the damage to our population.
I visited a synagogue in Chicago this past December. They are the finest example of a learning community I have witnessed. Rather than simply dropping off children at religious school on Sundays, the entire family — parents and children — attend school together.
The synagogue, Sukkat Shalom, brings in speakers ranging from Rabbi Ron Wolfson to writer Judith Viorst. Their “Sunday Morning Caffeine for the Brain” series covers everything from religious thought to politics, cooking to psychology. The result: Close to 100 percent retention rate after the families’ youngest children are a b’nai mitzvah.
Did I mention that within their congregation there are only four families who are not interfaith?
We have much to learn.