Comments (0)Facing Up
March 5, 2010Rabbi Deborah Wechsler
Special to the Jewish Times
For months, my children planned their costumes for Purim. As the festival drew closer, the choice of what they wanted to be changed daily, even hourly. First, it was Batman and Superman, then Queen Esther, then Vashti, then Tinkerbell, then a princess, then Elmo.
Luckily, there were three opportunities for them to dress in costume, so for their school celebration on Friday they were Queen Vashti and Superman, in synagogue for megillah on Saturday night they were Superman and Batman, and on Sunday for more megillah and the carnival they were Queen Esther and a Dalmatian.
What a delight to see so many people in costume and the different identities they inhabit or imagine for themselves. A parent remarked to me that he was surprised to see his normally sullen teenage daughter entertaining the preschoolers while hidden in her cartoon character costume. Perhaps the mask allowed her a measure of freedom to be the charming young lady that she really was inside. Isn’t it interesting how we can be more comfortable with our faces hidden from one another than we are in a face-to-face encounter?
This Shabbat, following fast on the heels of our costumed celebration of Purim, we read Parshat Ki Tissa. In a continuation of Moshe’s encounter with God, the parasha recounts, “God would speak to Moshe panim el panim face to face, as one man speaks to another” (Exodus 33:11). It is a startlingly anthropomorphic image, of God and Moses meeting face to face. The term panim el panim is found only five times in the Tanakh. It is generally used to convey a personal encounter, one not mediated through any other person or vehicle.
The great Biblical sage Rashi, in a very brief comment, quotes Onkelos, who says when God and Moshe met face to face, what God was really doing was mitmalel im Moshe, talking with him. Because of the interesting word that Rashi uses, there are two different ways to understand this.
Mitmalel could mean that God was talking to himself with Moshe. Think about how you might talk to yourself even while engaged in conversation with another. You use each other as foils, a trusting relationship allowing you to talk out your ideas, to be so open and candid that it is as if you were talking to yourself. One way to understand God talking to Moshe panim el panim has Moshe as witness to God’s innermost musings. In the safety of their encounter, God explores his own actions and thoughts and Moshe becomes a loving companion to that process.
Mitmalel could also mean that God was talking with Moshe in a mutual exchange. Think about the way that you might talk to a friend as an equal. Each brings something to the conversation and each takes something away. This is perhaps the more surprising reading; based on the understanding that God and Moshe could be equals in conversation or in any way. Another way to understand panim el panim has Moshe as God’s dear friend. Their mutual respect and affection allows them to meet each other face to face in a way that strangers or acquaintances could not.
If the image of God speaking to Moshe face to face sounds intimate and almost sensual, it should. Even the Torah sees the intimacy of it in extending the metaphor later in the narrative where it says God speaks to Moshe mouth to mouth. Where they could have used much simpler language, the Sages used this special word mitmalel to help us understand the unique relationship, but also the power of any unmasked encounter.
After a week of masked revelry, we enter this Shabbat with our faces revealed, ready to enter into intimate honest encounter with God and all whom we meet. Shabbat Shalom.
Rabbi Deborah Wechsler serves Chizuk Amuno Congregation.