Dor Flayshman was the kind of person who did not choose the easy setting for computer games.

When he played a new one, his best friend, Aaron Fisher, said Flayshman skipped the normal level and went directly to the hardest one. He might lose repeatedly, but he kept playing until he figured out how to win.

That persistence became far more serious after Flayshman was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer in 2023. Over nearly 3 1/2 years, he underwent nine surgeries, numerous rounds of chemotherapy and radiation and treatment in both Baltimore and New York.

Flayshman, an Israeli immigrant who lived in Sykesville with his wife, Melissa, and their two children, Maya and Noah, died Aug. 3 at 37.

“He was very strong and very brave,” Melissa Flayshman said. Even during the last year of his life, when he was in pain every day, she said, he continued trying treatments and held on to hope.

Fisher saw that determination when they played disc golf during Flayshman’s treatment. After a surgery kept him off the course for a month or two, Fisher said, Flayshman would return as soon as he was physically able. “As soon as he was ready, he’d come right back,” Fisher said.

Flayshman grew up in a small village in northern Israel, between Safed and Tiberias. His parents divorced when he was 13, and he lived with his mother and younger sister.

He later served in Israeli military intelligence, working with drones near the Lebanon border.

Melissa Hinds met him in 2009 while she was on a Birthright Israel trip. Flayshman was one of several Israeli soldiers who joined the group so participants could meet young Israelis.

He was the only soldier in the group who spoke fluent English, she said. He was also funny, constantly telling jokes, and he surprised her with his enthusiasm for 1980s hard rock and heavy metal.

“I was just instantly drawn to him,” she said.

Their relationship continued long-distance through Facebook, Skype and phone calls while Flayshman remained in Israel. She made aliyah in 2011 to be with him. About a month after she moved in with Flayshman and his mother, the house burned down during the night and they lost their belongings.

Flayshman wanted eventually to live in the United States, where he believed he would have more opportunities. He came on a fiance visa in November 2011 and the couple married the following month.

After receiving permission to work, Flayshman took a job in the parts department at Camden Auto Body in Reisterstown. He moved up to manager, became a licensed appraiser and later worked as an auto appraiser for Travelers.

Melissa said he had an unusual ability to look at a damaged car and quickly estimate what repairs would cost or whether the vehicle would be declared a total loss.

“He was excellent at it,” she said.

Outside work, Flayshman enjoyed computer games, chess and disc golf.

Fisher met Flayshman through their work as auto appraisers around 2015. They became close friends.

Fisher introduced him to disc golf, and the two often played several times a week.

The friends also shared a love of “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” and regularly sent each other clips from favorite TV episodes.

Flayshman’s Israeli accent supplied another running joke. Voice-to-text software, for example, repeatedly turned the word “gumbo” into “jumbo.” From then on, Fisher said, gumbo simply became “jumbo” between them.

Fisher said Flayshman was smart, direct and interested in almost everything. The two could talk about politics, finances or something completely silly, and they could debate and disagree and still remain close.

As a friend, Fisher said, Flayshman was dependable. If he said he would do something, he did it. He listened when friends needed to talk and did not leave people hanging.

At home, he was a playful father who joined Maya and Noah in games, danced with them and participated in whatever they wanted to do. He was also the stricter parent.

Fisher remembered Flayshman as especially patient with his children. Melissa and the children, he said, were “everything to him.”

The family became early members of Chabad of Carroll County after moving to Sykesville. Flayshman was proud of being Jewish and Israeli and closely followed events in Israel.

By 2023, however, Flayshman’s attention had shifted to fighting cancer. After months of symptoms and medical visits, a colonoscopy in May 2023 found a mass, and the cancer had already spread to his liver and lymph nodes, Melissa Flayshman said.

He was treated at Sinai Hospital in Baltimore and Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center in New York. He underwent surgeries, chemotherapy, radiation and a treatment that delivered chemotherapy directly to his liver.

Melissa said he tried every treatment offered because he wanted more time with her, Maya and Noah, then 9 and 4.

She hopes they remember both his determination to stay with them and the years before cancer changed their family’s life.

“I just hope that they remember that he fought so hard for them,” she said. “He wanted to live and he would have done anything to be here still. And I hope they remember all the fun times before he had cancer.”

Ellen Braunstein is a freelance obituary writer. She welcomes suggestions for individuals who had meaningful ties to the Baltimore Jewish community. Email csix@midatlanticmedia.com.