Rabbi Alison Kobey
This week’s Torah portion is Beshalach: Exodus 13:17 — 17:16
What do you do when you are terrified? How do you support yourself so you can acknowledge your fear, but not let it paralyze you? How do you find the strength to drive you forward? How do you accept change — begrudgingly or willingly, or some combination thereof?
Fear manifests itself in so many ways. It can consume our thoughts, paralyze us, reduce our emotional energy, cause us to retract or hide, or in a more positive way, it can help propel us forward. We have all experienced fear, whether something seemingly minor or something far more terrifying. For some of us, our fears may be more individual, such as my fear of bugs or someone’s fear of heights or flying. For some of us, especially in this region, our fears may be connected to a larger situation such as someone’s job uncertainty or someone’s health, and still others may be thinking about the ramifications of today’s politics, whether here in the U.S. or abroad. If we are honest with ourselves, there is always something either in the background or foreground of our brains, something that makes us reflect, that hits us in uncomfortable ways. Hold that thought …
Imagine the moment: The Israelites endured so many hardships and are finally being given a chance for freedom. They are rushing forward, but when they look back, the Egyptians are pursuing them. Their world is closing in on them and then they arrive at this gigantic sea. Moses cries out to God and God responds: “Why do you cry out to me? Tell the Israelites to go forward!” (Exodus 14:15) They cannot go back, but how can they go into the sea? The Midrash teaches us that while many Israelites paused or stopped, Nachshon was the brave one who kept running forward. And with his forward movement, God opened the sea and allowed the Israelites to cross from slavery into freedom: “The waters were split, and the Israelites went into the sea on dry ground, the waters forming a wall for them on their right and on their left. Then God delivered Israel that day from the Egyptians.” (Exodus 14:21-22)
The story, this sacred miraculous moment, is not a story of ancient history. It is our story: past, present and future all woven together. It is a piece of us, a reminder that miracles happen, a reminder that the hidden can be revealed. With the splitting of the sea, God empowered us to find a pathway to move past our collective and individual fears, to remember that we must not allow ourselves to get stuck. We can move forward even when it seems impossible. Miracles may not be as clear or as prominent in our lives as the splitting of the sea, but they exist, especially if we choose to believe and partner with God. The Reform prayerbook notes: “Pray as if everything depended on God; act as if everything depended on you.” Imagine if we fully lived those words.
There is such a thing as good fear. It is mixed with awe, as the Hebrew root yud-resh-alef denotes. It helps us know our place, helps us understand ourselves and our relationships and experiences, and still allows us forward motion. Good fear allows us a moment to metaphorically curl up like a ball but not get stuck in that uncomfortable position. Instead, fear mixed with awe allows us to unfold ourselves and stand straight and tall, seeing the fear in a new way. This week’s Torah portion helps remind us not to get stuck, but to move forward even when afraid. Fear and awe blended together allows the sea to part, whether the miraculous moment with Moses or our own individual, metaphorical seas. May we all see the miracles that unfold before us and may we all keep moving forward, even when afraid.
Rabbi Alison Kobey is the rabbi at Congregation Or Chadash, an active Reform synagogue in Damascus, Maryland, where she is now in her 17th year of serving as a rabbi there.
